Thoughts

Okay, so Im going to be very indirect in this blog because I don't want to give away too much detail just yet. Jon and I have had a proposition brought forth to us and we have mixed emotions. Mainly this proposition would be beneficial to our family right now and give us a chance to have a chance to be free from some things. Anyways, we need to make this decision fairly quickly and its scary. We've made good decisions and bad decisions in life and some have haunted us and some have helped us. We need to pray and seek God's wisdom. So please pray and one day I can share more. Pray that we are open to all options and the God will pave the path before us.

A Challenge Question

My pastor's wife asked my a question through my comment page regarding my last blog. She asked, "What are you learning? How have you felt you've grown?" Well, I was about to comment back in answering those questions but I realized I didn't know the answers. So I laid in bed last night thinking and thinking and praying.....and began to realize something.

Do you remember the book, "Are you there God, its Me Margaret?" I remember so well reading that book in preparation for becoming a young lady....if you know what I mean? In the book, the character was so open and blunt in her quest to find her true self, talking to God as if you were talking to a friend. I sometimes find myself talking to God like I talk to my friends or my husband. Is it wrong? Not really, however, I think just like people around us, we forget to honor them in our words, actions, etc. For instance, I love to pray because I know I can vent to God and he'll send peace and I can get it off my chest. But I am guilty of not praising him enough and falling deeper into his presence, almost forgetting that God is majestic and deserves more glory and honor than just an ordinary friend.

So, this revelation has not solved our problems. But it has made me realize that I am complacent at times when I need to be in God's word more each day and in prayer giving more attention to God and what he has done in my life. It has made me realize that when I feel like I've prayed all the prayers and read all the "encouraging" scriptures, that I need to look harder for what God is teaching me and telling me. Thanks Rhonda for your questions of wisdom.

Doubting Jessica

Okay, so I just want to vent. It seems like its been something Im really good at. But I need to get this out. I have been through the thick and thin in life to know that God is there for us. To know His plan is not our own. I have studied scripture after scripture and prayed every prayer for miracles. And yet I still have the inclination to shout out, "Hello, God, are you listening?" Ok, Jonny still doesn't have a permanent job. The one he has barely pays, and its in Fresno. So he could totally work at McDonalds right now and get more money.

My heart goes out to him because he is so talented and SMART. But because he doesn't have a degree or trade, it makes it difficult to find a decent job. I know men have this pride thing and want to support their family financially, so this has got to be hitting him hard. Everyone our age has started buying houses and investing in the future, and we can't even pay our bills on time. Its quite embarrassing so please know that I am being extremely transparent.

Seriously, I know God is working in our lives. And I know that he has a plan especially for Jonny. Its just been hard because this year has brought many tears of pain. (some for joy) Please say a prayer. Please know we are forever grateful for the many blessings we have and because of family and friends we have gotten through some rough storms. We just want God's favor in our lives. Thanks

The Wedding Has Come and Gone....Calgon Take Me Away

The wedding was here and now its gone. We had a lot of fun planning and enjoying being all dressed up! Thanks to our good friends that helped with the wedding and NATHAN...Charisse Hastings, Linda Pannett, and The Cagles. We couldn't have done it without you! And the reception was fun. I had so much fun dancing with my two left feet. And my grandpa who is 76 years old and my grandma were DANCING! And I don't mean in the spirit! And of course my hot hubby danced with me! Jennae and Doug are truly happy and I am so blessed to have been a part of it. I actually gained a new family out of it too because Doug's family has treated us like their own! More pictures to come and thanks to those who were able to make it. I truly appreciate it.
d

The Fight Is Not Over..........

Yesterday, I noticed when Nathan woke up that his urine has a very bad smell. I thought it was probably from all he had been through but I made a doctor's appointment just to be sure. I talked to the doctor about his traumatic experience and she said that they would need a urine sample. I fought tears and fought the urge to run out of the office, but I knew he needed help. Nathan screamed in terror as they placed just the simplest bag over his pee-pee and closed up his diaper. Doctor told us to wait. So my mom and I went to the market down the street and purchased juice so that he'll go in the bag. After 2 hours, our attempt failed as the doctor's office was closing and he had not gone.

When we got home, I took the bag off so he could be free......that was until he would go to sleep. And as soon as he did, I carefully put a new bag on. The next morning he was in bed with us and I checked his diaper......nothing. So, we got ready for work, and I held him in the chair and I smelled that awful smell and felt warmth on my pant leg. Sure enough, he went in the bag, in his diaper, down his leg and on my work clothes....BUT I was so excited I poured the specimen in the little cup and changed my clothes.

SO......I have talked to the Nurse Practioner and they said that he has a UTI. They are going to put him on antibiotics but they still want to do a sonogram and make sure there is no damage. They believe because he was double-cathed that this caused the inflammation. PLEASE PRAY THERE IS NO DAMAGE. This is so scary....it just started out as the stomach flu............

Definitely A Memorial Weekend

Well, we have had a interesting weekend. Nathan got sick early Friday morning (vomiting) and diarreah, fever, etc. So I stayed home with him and just let it run its course. He continued to throw up several times after that not keeping anything down. We called the doctor and the doctor said....."No more monkeys jumping on the bed"...Sorry I couldn't resist. He said just watch his temp and give him lots of fluids. By Friday night he hadn't thrown up so we thought he was getting better. Until 8pm he did it again. He slept through the night and the next morning he seemed a little better but totally lethargic. Later that evening, we managed to give hime JELLO and we thought this was a turning point. Until he threw it up. By this point he seemed totally lifeless and we took him in. By the time we rushed to the hospital he was severely dehydrated and couldn't pee even after drinking 12 oz. of fluid. They sent us to the ER (because we were in urgent care) and they worked on trying to find a vein. The next option the doc said was to do an IO which is basically and "IV" through his bone in his leg. The needle my friends was as thick as a nail. They did not sedate him and the blood curling scream was unbearable. (We werent allowed in the room) So after a while they decided the Central Valley Hospital didnt have the resources to maintain that particular "IO" and ordered an ambulance to take us to Childrens Hospital.

To my delight, they were the best in care and was very patient with him and gracious. They found a vein in his hand and took out that ugly thing in his leg. They admitted Nathan to the "Apollo" wing where he could get better. (All the wings are named after spaceships) Then finally this afternoon he was so much better and was able to go home. My advice to anyone is to go straight to Children's Hospital if at all possible anytime you need care and can make it there. Its worth the gas! Although we were transferred by ambulance so that was cool. Thanks for all of your prayers, we appreciate it so much!

I have always been proud of my little brother. I wasn't around him too much in his prime years because I had left home already and we were over 10 years apart but I always kept up with his life of rock.

Justin is one of the guitarists and singers for Flight 409 of Fresno. They've come a long way of their road to stardom and we share in his excitement. I have been blessed to come from such a musical family and then marry into a musical family. Jon's brothers both play guitar really well. His sister Kate plays saxaphone and sings!

So nevertheless, Nathan loves the guitar and is beginning to sing. I know God has given us a talented little boy and I pray that we will always embrace it!

These pictures are from the other night when Justin came over to practice for the song we are singing for Jennae and Doug's wedding. Its going to sound really good.